WHEN MARS AND VENUS ISN’T ENOUGH! CULTURAL DIFFERENCES

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love is blind. Love has no bounderies. Love has no race. True! When two people from the other side of the world fell in love both has to deal with the so called “cultural differences”.

Sometimes I find myself thankful to the Spanish and American colonization at least the culture where I came from is not much different from the rest of the world. My husband asked me about the giving of “dowry” because as he read about Asia he came across of giving “dowry” before marriage. He asked me if it is being practiced in the Philippines. I said no. (I should have said yes, maybe he’s willing to give dowry lol) As Philippines has many western influence and being an archipelago in south east Asia, we are far apart from the culture of our neighboring Asian countries. I guess even the looks I’ve always been mistaken as Spanish or “latina”. I forgot I have Asian nose lol. The only Asian thing in our culture I guess is eating a lot of rice and noodles.

My husband is Italian. I’m a Filipino. My husband is from a developed country and I am from a developing country. So here are our cultural differences.

TRAFFIC. When my husband is driving just 3 or 5 cars in front of him he starts complaining of traffic. Oh! we should have not take this road can you see the traffic. While on my end, where’s the traffic? My idea of traffic is when you are totally blocked and cars are not moving. lol He complain about too many traffic lights while on my end there are some places in my country that even needs traffic light but due to lack of funds or corruption cannot have it.

FOOD. I’m married to an Italian. That says it all. My husband love rice but not the way Asians cooked rice. Oh yeah, we love the rice just cooked in rice cooker and then the Italian rice in the risotto. 🙂 I know how good and how the world acclaimed the Italian cuisine but I will choose the Asian plain rice. It’s in the Asian genes haha. I know how to cooked pasta, spaghetti but just now I’ve learned the tricks of the authentic Italian cooking. Everyday is a learning process. I’m loving it.

WINES. I’m not a sucker of anything with alcohol. I will never appreciate any wine no matter how expensive they are, where castle they came from, for me they are all the same. My husband can tell whether they are bad or good. He even care what year it was fermented, if that’s the exact term for wine making.

CHEESE. I’m not a cheese lover too. My husband is a self-confessed cheese addict.

LANGUAGE. It is already given about the language differences but since we both speak English the difference lies between his BRITISH ENGLISH or my AMERICAN ENGLISH. ME: I bought some eggplant. HIM: What is eggplant? ME: (showing) HIM: ah! That’s aubergine in british english. ME: oh well! that’s eggplant in AMERICAN english. Ok we learn from each other that’s the best part of it.

MADE IN ITALY. It means QUALITY, REALLY GOOD QUALITY and I mean THE BEST QUALITY in all you do. Do your best in everything. The house should be keep as clean as it can be. My idea of cleaning is just removing the unnecessary but for him no you have to go to the smallest details of dirt and dust even if you don’t see it yet lol.

FASHION.  ITALY is the fashion capital! Enough said. How they do it? Let me show you. I love fashion but my love for fashion is not enough when I moved to Italy. Fashion means good quality of clothes which means you don’t have to shop at h&m, pimkie, or other similar brands because they are crap. I love those brands by the way haha. Fashion means proper clothes of good quality I repeat of GOOD QUALITY for every occassion. You have to dress well when you are going to the park, gardening, going to the beach, going to church, going to party or any other kind of occassion, they have the kind of dress for everything. From my country of origin, we dress for comfort. I mean we are trendy and fashionable but we can go to a wedding party without wearing proper attire and no one cares. 🙂

WEATHER. This kills me. You know I’m a tropic girl who grew up in an archipelago with 7, 107 islands, don’t ask me how many during high tide or low tide. Change of weather stresses me. Winter always makes me sad. Sun, sand and beach is always on my mind. You know growing up in tropics and in an archipelago means you can barbeque with your friends anytime of the day and you can swim even at night. That’s hard to imagine having spring spring, fall and winter. I have to admit I enjoyed my first snow fall. My husband can tell you my funny story. 😉

DAILY LIFE. How you treat your friends and your neighbours? Well, in my country of origin with your close friends and relatives you can tell them anything and everything you feel unless we say you are “Made in China” meaning you are fake. Here no. If you want to visit your friends home or relative you have to inform him/her ahead of time so he/she can clean the home and prepare nice food. While I can visit my friends or they can visit me anytime because they are my friends and they knew me well. I can open their fridge anytime and eat whatever I want hahaha. Real isn’t it?

COFFEE. Would you believe I don’t drink coffee? But I can take one from starbucks. Oh! Italians have the best coffee why would you drink coffee from a fake Italian bar? Can you see Starbucks derived it from the Italian bar. It is very evident from the words they used “cappuccino” “macchiato” “frapuccino” “latte” “Espresso” “vente” ….etc…

ANCIENT. For a European or an Italian to be particular, a 400 year old building or establishment is new. But for me 100 year old building or establishment is old.

MEMORIES. Taking photos about everything is a Filipino thing. Taking tons of photos is an evidence of memories to keep but for my husband photo is no no because you build memories in your heart not by the photos. “Carpe Diem” savor the moment.

Oh well I can add more to my lists. This just keep going. The important thing is we meet in the middle and compromise. We enjoy each others differences and just laugh it off. We are glad to adjust to each other and discover how things are treated on the ther side of the world. They say mixed marriages have the best babies because they have the best of both world. That we still have to find out very soon. 🙂

Love is the reason for most inter racial marriages. Love is powerful. Love is a language that everyone in the world can speak fluently. Hooray to inter racial marriages.

Here is my husband trying to be a Filipino.

Here is my husband trying to be a Filipino.

 

This is me during the Carnivale festa in Venice.

This is me during the Carnivale festa in Venice.

 

I hope you are all having a great week. Stay happy and smile.

 

Love,

anne

9 thoughts on “WHEN MARS AND VENUS ISN’T ENOUGH! CULTURAL DIFFERENCES

  1. Jeannette says:

    Loved this post Analyn! Love is everything and surpasses anything:-) I enjoyed reading about your cultures and families. I am a latina from Puerto Rico and my fiancée is a “gringo” from Indiana, US. Growing up he ate a lot of potatoes and I ate lots of rice. And the list goes on and on….. However, despite our differences we enjoy our lives together and love each other very much. I can relate to you a lot! You are such a sweet and loving human being and your husband is so blessed to have you in his life and I am sure is same way around. Have a wonderful weekend! XOXO, Jeannette

    http://www.msjeannieandhercloset.com

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